I am NOT the kind of mom that would have her own show about maternal instincts. These things have never come easy to me. I constantly look around to see what everyone else is doing and use that as a reference as to what I am doing right or wrong. I almost never feel confident with the decisions I make with my kids. I often walk around confused.
Since my kids have been raised by two addict/alcoholics, they might not have the same tools that most kids have. I will bet that they have some better tools than a lot of kids, along with some shitty ones. Here it is. My entire family says the "F" word. This is something that I am not proud of. In fact, it tears a piece of my soul out every time one of my little sweet angels utter an obscenity. It is so embarrassing to admit this. Of course, I am immature enough to find it SOMETIMES hilarious. This behavior is totally wrong by society's standard. But then, so am I in some ways
I am aware how bad this sounds.
Here is my whole deal with cussing. I do it, Bob does it, my dad does it, my grandpa did it, I've heard nuns do it, in fact, just about EVERY person I know does it to some degree. Yes, it is bad manners. It can hurt feelings. It can be offensive, oppressive or maybe abusive to many. But guess what? Your kids will eventually do it when you aren't around. You do it when you kids aren't around. Sometimes "SHIT" or "FUCK" is the best way to describe how bad stubbing your toe really feels. We all hide it from each other, until the kids get old enough, and then we say "shit" and "fuck" together. They are just words, after all. I know, I know, words can hurt. I am not saying this is right, but to me, there are worse things.
For the record, my kids only swear in the privacy of our home and sometimes out our windows. I have instructed them (and they listen to this) to not say these words when their friends are over. At least not in front of me when their friends are over, so we can keep up the illusion that I have done my parenting job correctly.
I have had many battles in the past two years trying to regrow this family from the depths of addiction. This one part seems really small, but I can assure you, I am working on it. I have tried everything from soap in the mouth, to ignoring it, screaming, privileges removed, explaining how they sound, etc. Their potty mouths have gotten MUCH better. But still, sometimes, my little babies talk like Marines.
So if you see us on the street, come up and ask us, "How the fuck are ya?" We are doing just fine.