I once set up a blog a few years ago, not knowing how to do it, and I don't even remember what the name of it was. It was going to be about being sober, except I wasn't. I wish I could remember what I called it. Maybe it was called "What a Fricken Dork."
I literally decided to do this blog, started two days after I decided, and did it. I think about starting things all of the time, but usually don't.
I didn't really read blogs, and I certainly didn't know there were so many of them. My friends on Facebook would sometimes say to me, "you should write" because maybe my life seems interesting, crazy or maybe my short status updates are so witty and inspiring. Or maybe they just appreciate a good train wreck.
One day, my friend Beth and I were talking and she asked me, "Do you read blogs?"
"Never, but I have thought of doing one."
She was like, "YOU HAVE TO. I'll come over tomorrow and set it up for you, you'll be great. Have stuff to make turkey wraps for lunch and we will get it started."
She is funny the way she thinks I have food in the house. So I went to the store to keep up the illusion.
We went back and forth about the name, and the description. I have a whole conversation in my Facebook messages of how this all began. It is pretty cool how we brainstormed and came up with Mom Off Meth so quickly. Like it was meant to be.
She came over, with a list in hand of a writing schedule, and the know-how to set the whole thing up. Then she showed me how to use Picasa for the cool photo collages that I put on here. I had no idea the woman was so handy. She can do all kinds of cool shit.
The schedule I have stuck too, although I think my blog posts might be too long, I am afraid I will run out of stuff to say. I think I will need to shorten these things down when I start school at the end of August. Maybe just do three days a week, in stead of five. But then again, I love to ramble, so maybe I'll work it out.
I am the queen of starting things, and then quitting. Like one year, I took up knitting. I bought HUNDREDS of dollars worth of yarn. I made ONE baby blanket, and gave the yarn away. I bought a bike one year and rode it five-hundred miles to Chicago. I barely rode it again. But exactly like those adventures, this feels different.
I will say that thinking of things to write about, remembering and reflecting on stuff that has happened or is happening, and typing it away, has been absolutely more enjoyable than I thought it would be. Hearing people's reactions and comments to what I write and how I think has been amazing. This is the best therapy I have ever had. I have remembered things that happened, of which I had forgotten about. It is helping me figure stuff out, and really focus on my recovery. I feel pretty damn good about doing this. So I will continue, until I don't feel like it.
Thanks for reading. Thanks to those who suggested I write. Thanks to Monte Bute at Metro State, who said he never gave out A's for papers, but that was all I got. That gave me confidence like nothing else. And thanks to Beth, who put this in my hands. I think it feels good.