When he realizes that she flushed his pills, the panic, the terror. I have felt that before. No one ever flushed anything of mine. I have felt like I would do ANYTHING to get more drugs in that instance.
I have combed through the carpet, picking up anything that resembled meth, and smoking it. And most of the time, it wasn't meth, because I usually was pretty careful about NOT dropping any. (ICK) I have missed birthday parties, missed meetings at school, all kinds of shit. I spent a lot of time, energy and heart ache getting those drugs.
The scene when they brought Johnny to the cabin and detoxed him. It showed it as if taking the drugs away will solve all of his problems. Like "he's been clean two weeks, he is fine." Man, if it were only that easy.
When he comes to after his horrific detox from opiates (or whatever he was all taking), he immediately feels the shame of what he has done in the past. He was bringing up the pain of his father. The pain of losing his brother, the pain of all he had done. That shit is real. And often that horror of realization of what we have done to our lives and the people we love, or the stuff we so badly screwed up, is usually what can drive us right back to using. Reality can hurt terribly. And the best way to fix hurt for an addicted person (before finding a recovery plan that works), is to pick up using again, and make that pain go away.
He couldn't get a gig because if the shit he pulled. He wanted to do some service work by playing for the prison. No one trusted his decisions. You've seen the movie, or another tale of his life on maybe VH1 or a documentary. It all seemed to work out for Mr. Cash.
I know nothing more about his recovery other than this movie. But it sure stirred up in me what it was like then, and what it is like now in my every day life. Thank goodness I don't have to dig through my carpet anymore, feel that pain, feel that shame, and I have found a way to keep it that way.
All I know is I do love that movie. And Joaquin Phoenix gave a fairly good example of the pain of addiction. Although sometimes he acted like a baby (like the way he spoke.) But maybe the Man in Black did too.
Anyhow, if these two weren't the cutest, I'm not sure what is.