Saturday, November 2, 2013

My sister

I have a big sister. No, she isn't "bigger" than me.  She's actually pretty short.  She's just WAY older than me (okay only 6 years, but it feels good to say that in a "bratty little sister" way.) But her heart is huge, and I really am so lucky to have her in my life.

I know, in many ways, she has felt the burden of the roll of my mom since I was 16. I even tried to live with her for a bit during my teen years. I dressed up in her nursing outfit, went to the liquor store, shaking with fear (I think I was 15 or 16) and bought a bunch of cases of Old Milwaukee Light (the good stuff) and threw a party in her newly owned home of her and her husband. 

She wouldn't let me use her car when she was out of town (I'm not sure I had a license), so I took it anyway, and threw the keys away on accident, and paid for a new ignition (or my friend Jay did.). Needless to say, I got caught because they had more than one set of keys, which no longer could start her car. 


Anyway, throughout the years we have remained close. There were times I pushed her away because I didn't like her advice (she's usually right) or I was just too far gone in hiding my addiction to talk to anyone.  

I had a lot of small kids and we weren't easy to be around. I remember her babysitting one time and RUNNING towards the door when we got home. The twins were babies and she barely said goodbye. I saw flames shooting off from her heels as she ran for her car.  What we had going on was not for the faint of heart. My sister likes things in order and controlled. It was impossible to achieve that with my brood. 

She has raised two daughters who are kind, sweet, and seem happy and are successful. I love my nieces. She has always loved being a mom, and let go and let them fly just as we are supposed to do. She is a great mother. I have always wanted to be like her so much. 

Her husband is fine. They love each other, but in my eyes, no one is good enough for my sister.  She deserves the best. 

She's the kind of wife that will get up at 4 AM to get the cooking, housework, her husband's lunch ready, and then leave the house to work all day at a stressful job, come home and make dinner and clean up. By herself. I have always told her that this isn't the 50's anymore, and she shouldn't have to do that. But I think she must enjoy it, or she is crazy, because she never stopped. 

She is also the kind of person who finds joy in little things. If you drive by where they dock sailboats on a summer day on White Bear Lake, she pulls into a parking spot, turns off the radio, rolls down the windows, and makes us listen to the ropes and hooks hitting the mast or booms or whatever they are called. Then she lets out a big sigh, and we pull out of the parking spot and we are on our way. 

She always talks up everything. Her vocabulary of descriptive words and phrases are never ending. Everything is "amazing" or "super sparkly" or beautiful, little, delicate, delicious, tiny, humongous, wonderful chocolatety, wonderfulness."  

She should be in sales because she makes everything sound terrific!  She's just an awesome person to be around.

My addiction was hard for her to swollow. She felt betrayed and lied to. Her feelings were justified. I did lie and betray her trust. But it took her a week TOPS to accept it, and we've come a long way. 

She is always there for me if I ask her. No matter what it is. She will tell me if my hair looks like shit, if I look super fat in an outfit, if I'm doing something wrong. She will also tell me I'm beautiful, doing great, and all of that. She is the one person who will be completely honest with me, and I need it. She will buy me a coat, clothes for interviews, and just is always there to talk if I want. She gives great advice. (Just ask me and I'll give you her phone number.)

She lives about 1/2 hour from me. That's my only complaint. She might not agree with this but I would love to live walking distance from her. But 1/2 hour will have to do. 

Recently she wasn't treated very nice by a family member. It wasn't fair. 

I encouraged her to try an do her part to repair a severed relationship, and she was met with absolute rejection. I feel so awful about this. I wish the importance of forgiveness was something everyone understood. 

She brings joy and happiness wherever she goes. And anyone who doesn't see that, obviously doesn't want to see it. And that is too bad for them, because my sister is a lot of fun and love and goodness.   I love you lady. 


  1. Aww, I wish she could be MY big sister too!

  2. What a sweet loving tribute to a great sister! Its very unfortunate that everyone does not know the joy and freedom of forgiveness. I cant imagine someone being mad at your sister after all the greatness you just described.

  3. Wow, this was really touching... I hope she is given the chance to read this as well. Sounds like you are both lucky to have each other.