Monday, January 12, 2015

Helicopter mama

Raise your hand if you can relate. (Or just be fucking polite and pretend for me.)

A few months ago, my kids' principal wrote his own blog post (or newsletter article) on the "Helicopter Parent." Of course, I was certain this article was directed at me, because I am THAT important in my mind. 

Maybe it was?  Very doubtful...I think. 

After I stopped being pissed and stopped thinking about the lawsuits and shit (I told you I was depressed, skipping meetings, and getting pretty sick) I took a hard look at myself. OH MY GOD I AM!!

Once I figured this out, I began getting more pissed at my friends who didn't stop me!!

Oh...wait...not their job. (Again my healthy thinking took a hit).

I don't want my kids to suffer any pain. So when I think they are going to get hurt, or they do get hurt, I fly in with machine guns drawn, and attempt to destroy anyone in their way.  Anyone.  The school, their friends, their friends' parents, their coaches, even the POLICE!  It has helped sometimes, but it has also backfired in some major, embarrassing ways.  Not to mention, I robbed them of some problem solving opportunities. I also robbed them of an opportunity to build some healthy coping skills for when life gets ugly, which they desperately need. 

I'm not putting myself down, I do what I think is right. But as I keep parenting, making mistakes, and learning from them, I will do better. Hind sight is pretty damn close to 20/20. It would be nice if we had the information before we made the mistakes. And because this is true for me, I am not sure why I didn't trust it was the same for my kids. They need the same opportunities.  

What's that you say?  You tried to tell me and I didn't listen? ...Know-it-all.

Live and learn!  So now,  I will still help my kids, but I will also let life hit them in the ass a little when their choices call for consequences. Because my lessons don't hold a candle to what life can serve up. 

ONE Alanon meeting and look at me go…  Nearly cured.

8 comments:

  1. Thanks for. ...being on our agenda today. You are Amazing. .

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    1. I am here! I just have been not feeling the writing thing lately! I keep promising I'll blog, and then I don't actually do it!! I'll try soon. Thank you:)

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  3. Betsey, I hope you are doing well, you are missed! ~ Marcy

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    1. Thank you Marcy. I'm trying to be more active here...again. Wrote a post today!

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